A Bird Summit (Pt. 2)
or, One Walked INTO the Cuckoo's Nest
A Playlet
Written by Collectivist
(Author's note: Over a year ago, as the Covid pandemic was raging across the world, I wrote, and posted on Snowflakes' blog*, the first of what is intended to be a series of short plays entitled "A Bird Summit, or, It's After the End of the World!)" . . .Since then, our fine feathered friends met again, under extraordinarily new circumstances 
). .
*I was eventually banned.
(Two Lovebirds coo and kiss at midnight)
CROW
(Alighting beside them) What the hell is this? The avian Love Connection?
LOVEBIRD #1
(Laughs) What does it look like?
CROW
It looks you two have no idea what time it is.
LOVEBIRD #2
(Looking lovingly at mate) It's time. . . for love.
HEN
(Arriving) So, you guys don't know what happened earlier in the day on Turtle Island?
PIDGEON
(Appearing) Nothing happened that I'm aware of.
EAGLE
(Swooping down into their midst) It figures that you'd be clueless.You live in chronic denial.
PIDGEON
(Defensively) Yo mama lives in chronic denial!
CROW
Cut it out y'all. (To Hen:) Give us the 4 -1- 1.
HEN
Sure.
Those people are definitely on the verge of another civil war. The orange headed clown gave a highly provocative speech and the next thing you know, hundreds of them were storming their capitol building.
EAGLE
Yeah, me and my wife watched the whole thing from high on a mountain top. It was better than reality t.v.!
HEN
(Sighs heavily) Well, I was there.
LOVEBIRD #2
So, you escaped again from the chicken farm?
HEN
(Emphatically) You damn right I did. Free at last, free at last! -
EAGLE
Come on now. Stay focused.
HEN
Anyway, I happened to be walking in front of the capitol when I saw about a thousand people with MAGA signs shouting "STOP THE STEAL."
LOVEBIRD #1
And no one noticed you?
HEN
I know how to maintain a low profile. . . Once they got to the capitol, a bunch of 'em started scaling the walls, while others broke through a window!
PIDGEON
No armed guys in blue showed up?
HEN
Some made a feeble attempt to stop the madness. Others were taking selfies with the mob. It was wild!
(A loud "whooooo" is heard, as an Owl alights. The Crow squeals with trepidation)
OWL
Ah, relax. I just ate a big meal. I'm full.
HEN
The mob attacked some of the security guards, vandalized and stole property and threatened to kill the Speaker of the House and the Vice President. After it was all over several people had been killed and hundreds wounded.
EAGLE
(Bitterly) I wish all of them had died.
PIDGEON
All of who?
EAGLE
All the humans!
PIDGEON
That's a terrible thing to say. Some of my best friends are humans.
EAGLE
You only say that because you've been domesticated all your life. They use you like a tool, you house slave.
PIDGEON
And they use you as a mascot. What's the difference?
OWL
The difference is, he almost became extinct because of . . .humans.
HEN
THEY ARE NOT HUMANS. I know real humans when I see them.
PIDGEON
Is that before or while they eat you?
(The Lovebirds giggle)
EAGLE
No need to worry, guys. Their time is almost up.
LOVEBIRD #2
How so?
EAGLE
Think about the pandemic.
HEN
That's just about over, ain"t it?
OWL
Not really. . .And there are bigger, deadlier threats on the horizon.
You see, several major planetary boundaries have been crossed. Besides catastrophic climate changes, Earthbeings are now facing rapid declines in genetic diversity, ocean acidification, rifts in the nitrogen and phosphorus cycles, loss of freshwater resources, chemical pollution -
( A loud THUNDER CLASP is heard.
All the birds scatter)
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